The Psychology of Fun, Café Psychologique 26 March

Are we having fun yet? Sometimes it’s hard to tell. One person’s fun is another person’s torment, and some types of ‘fun’ activity are quite hard work. Humans certainly seem to need fun. Psychiatrist Stuart Brown, and found of the National institute of Play in California (it just had to be California) says play is what builds complex, skilled, responsive, socially adept and flexible people. Even as adults, play creates new neural connectinons, and people who do not play and have fun are often joyless, workaholic, and fundamentally depressed.

So we need fun, but are often slow to make space or take opportunity for it, and it really is hard to predict what any individual will find fun. More contentious is the question of whether there is a genuine difference between people about what constitutes fun, or whether there are some things that are intrinsically fun – splashing in puddles perhaps, or being tickled, or watching birds perform courting rituals on the wing – and it is inhibition and learned resistance that stops some people from enjoying them.

This café will attempt to explore the psychology of what fun is and how we can engage with it more fully. Terry McAndrew is a regular Café Psychologiste and also a Content Manager at the NHS Leadership Academy, and will introducethis conversation and perhaps even stimulating some fun on Tuesday 26 March, 8.00 pm to 9.45 pm in Seven Arts, Chapel Allerton, Leeds. The Café costs £4 on the door.

There is a poster to download here:
Café Psychologique March 2019

You can read how the Café works here:
Café Psychologique Rules

Pets: who owns who? Café Psychologique 26 February

Pets are clearly popular: over half of British Households own a pet, or are owned by a pet! But the BBC reported in 2017 that pet ownership is falling, mainly due to economic pressures and an increase in people renting accomodation where pets are not allowed. However, some people seem unable to live without their pets. So much so that from the outside the relationship might not look just co-dependant, but that the owner is dependant on the pet. Certainly some pet owners lavish time, money and attention on pets that seem to hardly give them the time of day. Yes, we do mean cats. Other pets seem able to take over the household and all it’s disposable income in return for taking their owners out for a drag twice a day.

However, there are plenty of studies that show the psychological and physical benefits of pets, and plenyy of evidence from pet owners that they find pets add pleasure and fulfilment to their lives, regardless of the demands and costs they bring with them.

This café will explore the psychology of owning pets and the nature of the relationships we form to pets – whether we love them or loathe them.

Dr Carol Martin is a clinical psychologist and self-confessed cat owner. She will introduce this Café on Tuesday 26 February, 8.00 pm to 9.45 pm in Seven Arts, Chapel Allerton, Leeds. The Café costs £4 on the door.

There is a poster to download here: Café Psychologique February 2019

You can read how the Café works here:
Café Psychologique Rules

Commitment: the problem of sticking to things. Café Psychologique 29 January

Good intentions lead us to make new year resolutions, decide to lose weight, learn to play an instrument, make it to university, buy a house, or even promise to spend the rest of our lives with someone else.

There’s no doubt that these, and many other things we set out to do, demand commitment from us. In fact without making a commitment many ventures never start at all, whether setting up a busines or embarking on a serious relationship. Whether it’s an exercise class, a religion or a clothing brand the people selling are looking for a commitment from us. However, maintaining that commitment is often harder than it appeared at the start, and there’s also no doubt that many of us fail to remain committed, sometimes to big things as well as small.

So why is it so hard to make a commitment and stick to it? Is it just that we are weak, lazy creatures with a predisposition to prefer junk food to exercise, sleeping around to fidelity, the easy option to the noble. It might also be that some comitments are better not kept.

This café will explore the psychology of when and how commitment is needed and helpful, what gets in its way, and what helps us keep to the commitments we want to make.

Dr Philippa Sammons and Dr Emilie Smithson are clinical psychologists and will introduce this Café on Tuesday 29 January, 8.00 pm to 9.45 pm in Seven Arts, Chapel Allerton, Leeds. The Café costs £4 on the door.

There is a poster to download here: Café Psychologique January 2019

You can read how the Café works here:
Café Psychologique Rules

Sleep: why we need it and how to get it. Café Psychologique, 27 November

A good night’s sleep – most of us have an idea of what that feels like and just how good it leaves us feeling, but how does it work and why can it be so elusive? It seems all mammals and birds sleep. Probably reptiles too but scientists seem less clear about that. Even going further down the food chain, plants and bacteria have a resting phase, so maybe not sleep, but it seems all living things probably need rest, and complex organisms have a sleep-wake cycle which needs to be made up if it’s missed.

The reasons for this seem complex too. Common understanding includes the need for the body to physically recover and for the mind to process information gained in the day. Perhaps less well known is that sleep is key for managing body temparature, maintaining weight and ensuring a well functioning immune system. As for brain function, start to lose sleep and we also start to lose memory, experience mood imbalance and fail to concentrate.

All of which begs the question, if sleep is so integral to human functioning why did the Great British Sleep Survey find that only 39% of adults get a good night’s sleep? Even those of us who do sleep well, often find that we are not getting enough because we are slow to get to sleep, wake early, or just don’t get to bed in time. Even more importantly, the question of how to deal with sleep difficulties seems to have as many beliefs and myths as an insomniac has tosses and turns.

Emily Stanyer is a Sleep Researcher in the School of Psychology, University of Leeds, and she will introduce our conversation about why we need sleep and how to get it on Tuesday 27 November, 8.00 pm to 9.45 pm in Seven Arts, Chapel Allerton, Leeds. The Café costs £4 on the door.

There is a poster to download here: Café Psychologique November 2018

You can read how the Café works here:
Café Psychologique Rules

Halowe’en: Remembering the Darkness. Café Psychologique, 23 October

All Hallows Eve was intended to begin the honouring of the saints celebrated on All Hallows Day. Hard to keep that in mind when faced by half-a-dozen small children demanding payment by menaces – also known as ‘Trick or Treating’. What’s true is that contemporary celebrations of Hallowe’en have moved just as far from the Celtic harvest festivals and Roman celebrations of the dead that prefigured the original Christian expression of Hallowe’en

Nonetheless, a preoccupation with the ghoulish, the ghastly, the possession of evil, and the permanence or otherwise of death persists through the centuries. The present packaging of halloween distracts from the useful, even vital role that might be played in having our fear of the dark, the demonic or the unknown brought to mind. These things are clearly too troubling to attend to every day, but too important to completely ignore. Much of contemporary culture, including the world of self-improvement and self-help demands we focus on the positive, for fear the negative will weigh us down and hold us back. This Pollyanna approach is easily challenged by the realities of a world in which things do go wrong, not everyone is lovely, and we can’t always win.

This café will help us explore how and why we might need to be reminded of the darkness, and the place of Hallowe’en in connecting us with not just our fears about pain, loss and death, but also our joy in life.

Our conversation will be introduced by Café Psychologique favourites storyteller Matthew Bellwood, and performer and writer Alison Andrews, on Tuesday 23 October, 8.00 pm to 9.45 pm in Seven Arts, Chapel Allerton, Leeds. The Café costs £4 on the door.

There is a poster to download here:
Café Psychologique November 2018

You can read how the Café works here:
Café Psychologique Rules

Mental Health Stigma: what it means to you. 25 September

So we know the figures: 1 in 4 of us in the UK will experience a difficulty with our mental health in any given year. Yet it remains very difficult to talk about and address our mental health individually or as a society. One study showed that over 70 percent of young people say that the stigma around mental health difficulties has made them less likely to talk with others about their mental health.

It’s clear that many employers are reluctant to employ people with current or historic mental health difficulties. It’s also clear that for all the government speeches about prioritising mental health services, many people find it very difficult to find appropriate treatment and support for even common difficulties such as depression and anxiety, never mind anything more unusual. Those who do look for support in the NHS can find excellent people doing excellent work, but lack of resources often mean long waiting times and limits on the services provided. Sadly, not everyone receives a good deal at the hands of professionals and many people seeking help for mental health difficulties describe experiencing stigma even from health services which are not always structured to meet their particular needs.

This café will offer space to talk about the experience of mental health difficulties ourselves or for family and friends, and any stigma that has been experienced as a result. We shall talk about whether things seem to be improving or worsening. We shall also talk about what might help to reduce stigma, enable people to make use of the services they need, and engage with life around them without discrimination or rejection. We shall talk about what works at the moment and what needs to change in services, society, neighbourhoods and even in ourselves.

Whatever your experience and relation to mental health difficulties, you are welcome to talk and think at Café Psychologique. Our conversation will be introduced by Helen Williams, a clinical psychologist, on Tuesday 25 September at 8.00 pm to 9.45 pm in Seven Arts, Chapel Allerton, Leeds. The Café costs £4 on the door.

There is a poster to download here:
Café Psychologique September 2018

You can read how the Café works here:
Café Psychologique Rules

Siblings: how has birth order shaped your life? Café Psychologique 24 July

It’s not hard to see that growing up with brothers and sisters will have an effect on you. Also that not having any makes a difference. However there is a widespread belief that the order you arrive in your family has a significant impact too.

One version of this has it that the eldest child on average will be given more privilege, take more leadership and have more career success. Similar ways of looking see middle children likely to be more focussed on relationships and better as team players, and youngest children as more risk-takers, funny and eager to please.

Ask people themeselves and eldest children often feel they had to take more than their fair share of responsibility, middle children feel their needs are overlooked, and youngest children feel they are not taken seriously.

Then there’s the question of only children: either feasting on their parents’ or caregivers’ exclusive attention, or lonely and excluded with no natural playmates and lacking the opportunity to learn to compete.

Or maybe none of this matters, and genetics and the way you are brought up all have much more effect than the random place you occupy in your family.

Whatever your view, you are welcome to talk and think about the role birth oder plays at Café Psychologique. Our conversation will be introduced by Yvette Fidler, an experienced Café Psychologiste, on Tuesday 24 July, at 8.00 pm to 9.45 pm in Seven Arts, Chapel Allerton, Leeds. The Café costs £4 on the door.

There is a poster to download here:
Café Psychologique July 2018

You can read how the Café works here:
Café Psychologique Rules

Gender! What is it good for? Absolutely nothing! Café Psychologique 26 June

Gender turns out not to be quite as straightforward as some of us thought. An understanding of LGBTQ+ ideas is beginning to challenge many assumptions and practices that have informed and structured much of our life in contemporary Britain. That said, getting your head around all of the issues is far from straightforward too, and even those of us who want to be inclusive can find ourselves confused and nervous of giving offence.

Meanwhile there are still plenty of us who think the issues are perfectly straighforward and might wonder what all the fuss is about.

As usual Café Psychologique will provide an opportunity to think about Gender from a psychological perspective. We shall wonder whether Gender is greater than a binary, and whether our present understandings and concepts of Gender are fit for the realities of our lives and work. We won’t have all the answers but we’ll try to explore and think about these things and more.

Jo Charsley and Tom Matthews are clinical psychologists who work for the NHS Gender Identity Development Service in Leeds, and they will introduce our conversation on Tuesday 22 May, at 8.00 pm to 9.45 pm in Seven Arts, Chapel Allerton, Leeds. The Café costs £4 on the door.

There is a poster to download here:
Café Psychologique June 2018

You can read how the Café works here:
Café Psychologique Rules

Age: what diffference does it make? Café Psychologique, Tuesday 22 May, 8.00 pm

It seems obvious that our age makes a difference in all sorts of ways, but why, and does it always need to? Some of the differences may be simply imposed by our own or others’ assumptions, perhaps about what we might be capable of or what would interest us.

Take the discussion about voting age, for instance. Young people in Scotland now can vote when they are 16, while their peers in the rest of the UK have to wait until they are 18. Fascinatingly, turnout by 16 and 17 years olds in Scotland has been higher than that for 18 to 24 year olds (Electoral Reform Society). It is also notable that the arguments deployed against younger people voting (they aren’t informed enough, are too susceptible to influence, aren’t interested, and so on) are all arguments that were previously used to prevent other groups such as women and servants from voting.

Distinctions also abound in advertising. Judging by marketing as a whole you could easily think that young people are not interested in finances or planning for the future, and that older people have no interest in sex, fashion or adventure holidays.

Many parents exercise themselves about when their children are ‘old enough’ to have a phone, go online, watch particular films, or walk to school. Employers too seem so keen to use age as a way of judging suitability that laws are needed to stop them asking for age, except where it is vital to a job.

With these pressures it wouldn’t be surprising if we limit ourselves too, deciding that certain clothes are to young or old for us, or that certain places or activities or even potential partners aren’t suitable at our age.

Vicky Ola is a regular Café Psychologiste and she will introduce a conversation about age and the responsibilities and privileges associated with different age groups. This café is on Tuesday 22 May, at 8.00 pm to 9.45 pm in Seven Arts, Chapel Allerton, Leeds. The Café costs £4 on the door.

There is a poster to download here:
Café Psychologique May June July 2018

You can read how the Café works here: Café Psychologique Rules

Jazz: The self, the group, society and jazz. Café Psychologique 24 April

Jazz has its roots in African music, coming into being through the African slave communities in the southern states of the USA in the early 19th century. It quickly spread far and wide and now there is barely a country in the world that doesn’t have some kind of jazz scene. For all that it is global it is also a subculture, adored by millions but rejected by many. It clearly divides opinion. As Frank Zappa supposedly put it: ‘Jazz isn’t dead, it just smells funny’. This cafe isn’t just about Jazz as a musical art form and the psychology of how it can provoke such powerfully differing opinions. We shall also look at the role jazz plays in providing a sense of identity and what it can do to put people in touch with themselves and each other.

One of the interesting, and sometimes troubling things about jazz is that it relies so heavily on improvisation, leaving the listener uncertain of what will happen. For some that is exciting, for others unsettling and unwelcome. In our conversation we shall look at how jazz is created by the interactions between people and how it can provide a means of development, growth and change. We shall also look at how it emerges from, reflects, and can shape the societies in which it is created.

Whether you love or hate jazz, in whatever form, there will be something for everyone to talk about, and in our improvised conversation we hope something beautiful and cathartic might emerge. Just like jazz.

This café will be introduced by Jim Bailey, a retired psychotherapist and jazz fan, on Tuesday 24 April at 8.00 pm to 9.45 pm in Seven Arts, Chapel Allerton, Leeds. The Café costs £4 on the door.

There is a poster to download here:
Café Psychologique April 2018

You can read the Café Rules here: Café Psychologique Rules

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